Families navigating separation, divorce, custody, and co-parenting decisions often face an exhausting reality: the traditional court process can be expensive, slow, and emotionally draining—especially for children. To help meet this moment, the American Arbitration Association (AAA) has expanded its services to include family mediation, launching a new family mediation panel, beginning in New York and Massachusetts.
To talk about what’s driving the expansion—and what families should know about mediation—we sat down with Tracey Frisch, AAA Division Vice President of Mediation, and Attorney Gabrielle Hartley, a well-known family mediator and practitioner in New York and Massachusetts.
Why the AAA is Expanding into Family Mediation
For Tracey Frisch, the decision was both timely and mission-aligned.
“The AAA is known for neutrality, procedural integrity, and excellence in dispute resolution. Bringing those standards into the family space,” Tracey says, “is a meaningful way to improve access to high-quality, fair family dispute resolution—especially as more people seek alternatives to litigation.”
The AAA has a long history of designing efficient, equitable dispute resolution systems that support access to justice. Extending that expertise into family mediation builds on this foundation—particularly at a time when more families are actively seeking alternatives to litigation. Tracey also credits the leadership and vision of AAA President and CEO Bridget McCormack, whose focus on innovation, public impact, and user-centered dispute resolution helped drive the program forward.
Additionally, family mediation is a large—and growing—area of mediation. “It felt like a blind spot not to have it,” Tracey notes.
Why Start in New York and Massachusetts
Launching first in New York and Massachusetts reflects both strategic planning and the strength of each state’s family law and mediation communities.
New York is one of the country’s largest and most diverse family law markets, with high demand and complex caseloads. It also has a well-established mix of court-connected and private ADR, making it a natural starting point.
Massachusetts offers a distinct advantage through an AAA partnership with Suffolk Law School’s Innovation Clinic, along with involvement from respected leaders in the space—including Chief Justice John Casey, who served for years as Chief Justice of the Massachusetts Probate and Family Court and is joining the AAA’s Massachusetts mediator panel.
Attorney Gabrielle Hartley also played a key role in shaping the program by helping identify a cohort of deeply experienced, highly regarded family mediators whose expertise strengthens the panel from the outset.
When Family Mediation Is Most Effective
According to Gabrielle, mediation is well-suited for a wide range of family matters—particularly when individuals are trying to reduce conflict and make thoughtful, forward-looking decisions. These include divorce and separation, custody and parenting plans, property distribution, prenuptial and postnuptial agreements, and ongoing co-parenting disputes.
“Mediation allows families to move away from the posturing that often accompanies litigation and toward collaborative problem-solving. It also provides a space where people can speak more openly and focus on practical solutions, rather than positional arguments.”
Choosing Between Mediation and Court
For families deciding whether to pursue mediation or litigation, Gabrielle emphasizes the importance of slowing down and making an informed choice. Understanding potential best- and worst-case outcomes in court can help families assess what they truly hope to gain through the legal process.
While court may be necessary in some circumstances—such as when one party refuses to engage or an immediate enforceable order is required—many disputes can be resolved without placing decision-making entirely in the hands of the court.
Gabrielle also underscores that family disputes are never just about the adults involved. How parents navigate separation becomes part of their children’s long-term story, shaping their sense of security and identity. Even in high-conflict situations, she notes, it is rarely too late to step back and pursue resolution through mediation or other settlement processes.
Why Gabrielle Chose Mediation
Gabrielle’s focus on mediation stems from a long-recognized gap in traditional legal training. While attorneys are taught zealous advocacy, they are rarely trained to account for the long-term emotional, financial, and relational impact of adversarial processes on families.
Family disputes are often handled within systems designed for criminal or accident-based cases, not for ongoing family relationships. Outcomes can vary widely depending on the judge, particularly in matters involving finances and children. Mediation keeps decision-making closer to where it belongs—within the family—while still allowing for informed guidance from legal professionals.
Shifting National Trends
Both Gabrielle and Tracey see a continued national shift toward more collaborative and humane approaches to family conflict. Families are increasingly turning to mediation, embracing shared custody arrangements, and working with integrated teams that may include financial specialists, child experts, and divorce coaches.
There is also broader cultural awareness and acceptance of mediation, particularly in the family space, where people are more likely to recognize it as a legitimate and effective alternative to litigation.
Common—and Costly—Mistakes
One of the most damaging mistakes families make is attempting informal, unsupported agreements in an effort to save time or money. Often, one person believes an agreement has been reached while the other views the discussion as exploratory. When outside advice is later sought, misunderstandings unravel, leading to increased conflict, delays, and expense.
Gabrielle encourages families to approach mediation as a structured process: first learning, asking questions, and gathering information before making decisions. Taking time to gain clarity—rather than rushing to resolution—often leads to more durable, less costly outcomes.
High-Conflict Situations and Mediation
“Mediation isn’t magic,” Gabrielle emphasizes, "and it requires at least some willingness to listen and keep an open mind.”
If both parties are completely convinced mediation won’t work, and their lawyers agree, court may be the appropriate route. But for many high-conflict situations, she uses strategies designed to reduce emotional escalation, including:
- Keeping parties in separate rooms (or virtual breakouts)
- Focusing on underlying needs rather than positional demands
- Bringing in counsel when necessary—even if clients originally wanted to go without lawyers
The goal is to keep stress lower and help people use their thinking brain, not their fight-or-flight response.
Expanding Access Through the AAA
Tracey believes one of the greatest challenges families face is identifying a qualified mediator they can trust. Because family mediation is often delivered by solo practitioners, it can be difficult for consumers to evaluate credentials and experience.
The AAA helps address this gap by carefully vetting mediators, maintaining consistent standards, and offering a trusted resource for families across a wide range of socioeconomic backgrounds. As a nonprofit organization, expanding access to high-quality ADR remains central to the AAA’s mission—particularly for families and children affected by ongoing conflict.
Now Available: AAA Family Mediation Services
The AAA’s family mediation panel is now available in New York and Massachusetts, expanding access to neutral, high-quality, and user-centered family dispute resolution. Built on the AAA’s long-standing standards of excellence, the program is designed to help families navigate conflict with greater clarity, dignity, and stability, with plans to expand to additional states as the year progresses.
For those exploring family mediation, the AAA offers a trusted starting point—and continues to develop resources and services to support families as the program grows.